Survival strategy for men

Do any of you guys get dumped even before you have found your groove in a relationship? Does your girlfriend run out to beat you black and blue? Here is a ten point survival list that you should remember, come hail, come storm!

10.God, you look so much like your mom!

Better not say this to a girl, unless you want her for an aunt.

Move far off from this topic for safety reasons.

9.I would have invited you, but you’re no fun.

At this point, a white lie is mandatory.

8.Do not delve on the family fact file.

While some girls would just love a mature boy who talks about life and its small intricacies, others would go mad! They could not care less, especially, if you are not sincere. They are out for fun so this will get you into trouble.

7.Would have, could have, should have.

Talk philosophical whenever you want, with your friends but when it comes to your female pals, it is a big no! Avoid getting sentimental.

Keep it simple,  that is our advice.

6.Stop splurging money!

Never say this to a girl, even if she is the richest person around.

5.Keep the skeletons locked:

Do not be honest about your life unless you know where the relationship is going.

It may be cool for your girls to know about your past achievements and failures but it is no good digging the past.

4.Come on, a few little cramps never hurt anybody.

Instead, just ask whether they would like to have a can of coke. Remember, she never makes fun of your bruises when you were hurt at games. So be courteous and show concern. This would definitely make your day!

3.What’s the big deal? You have another birthday next day!

After forgetting ‘her’ birthday, the only option left for your is to run! Flee, before anything happens to you! Forgetting your girlfriend’s b’day is the biggest sin of your life; tell your parents, friends or siblings to inform you or promise her friends, chocolates for reminding you. She wants to feel special, centre of your universe, where she belongs.

2.You have put on weight.

This is forbidden territory. Suggest healthy eating, working out together or any such thing that does not hurt her.

1.That’s not the way my ex did it.

Never compare notes or else be sure to be dropped like a rotten potato.